The List

Come on Ladies, you know "the list" I am talking about... the one you sat down in high school and made with all the qualities your future husband MUST have. Then you revised it a couple of times over the years, as you learned about yourself and made decisions about which qualities were negotiable and which were not. You meet a guy, you go on a date, and if you're anything like me you are like a Rolodex in your mind checking off each time he makes "the list". Sense of humor: check, Charm: check, Big Brown Eyes: check.

For me, I am totally Type A and controlling so my list was pretty thorough and I was in a 5 year relationship with my "high school sweetheart" who only had like 2 qualities on my list. I knew he wouldn't be "the one" I just kind of didn't know how to end it. Needless to say when I came out of that relationship and started "fraternizing" with the boys in college, I got really strict about adhering to my list. You don't make the list?! You are dismissed! Again, totally type A. I was kind of like Katherine Heigl in "The Ugly Truth" - neurotic you say? well, that's a mean way to put it but yea kind of.

I wish I could find the actual hard copy of my list ... I assure you I had one, but here are some of the items I remember being on it:

*Must be at least one inch taller than me

* Must be musically inclined (play an instrument, sing, or both)

* Must challenge me / have an assertiveness about him

*Must be funny and silly

*Must be outgoing

*Must love Jesus

*Must read well (aloud)

*Must write well (grammar and spelling)

*Must be ambitious and have career goals

*Must NOT be "ghetto" in clothing style, speak, or music. NO reggaeton on his play list.

*Must have a car

The list goes on and on... I had this "box idea" of how my future husband needed to be and I refused to waste my time on anyone that didn't fit inside of my box.

Cut to January of 2007 -- In walks J.J. to my crazy life... and the box is (what box?) ripped to shreds.

Isn't he adorable? I know, I know... ;)

For our first date, we went to the South Street Seaport to see the "Bodies" exhibit and spent about 6 hours together. It was easy, it was natural and we fit like a glove from the very start. I remember the "aha" moment I had on our 4th date; we were sitting in a Starbucks having coffee and he got up to get some napkins. As he walked across that coffee shop I just felt it in my spirit, like a burst all of a sudden - That man is my husband!

God knew exactly what I needed in a partner and of course, I THOUGHT I knew what I needed. We got married on October 5th, 2008 and I am so excited to celebrate our 3 year anniversary as husband and wife tomorrow!

J.J. is one of the two greatest gifts I have been given and although he actually does have the majority of the qualities on my "list", he also has made my life full on so many other levels, in ways I could have never foreseen or imagined for myself. He makes me want to be a better woman every day and he accepts me for who I am. Our connection runs deeper than words can describe and I know in my Spirit that he was ordained for me, destined to journey this life by my side and I am blessed beyond measure.

You see, the fullness of God's love -- the depth, the width, the eternalness is humanly realized in marriage. The bond of a husband and wife is a mirror of the bond between Christ and his church. I never fully experienced this Agape love until God gave me J.J. This amazing love has continued to blow me away as God has now given us Aiden :) No set of plans, No list I could ever write can compare or even come close to that!

I still feel like Katherine Heigl in "The Ugly Truth", except I feel more like this part of the movie:

Yep, I'm doing my Happy Dance =)

I am so grateful that God came in threw "my list" away. He knew exactly what I needed and I have never been happier. I'm looking forward to our date night tomorrow to celebrate!

J.J, I love you Papito!